Do you feel disconnected from your partner? Are you constantly arguing? Do you feel like the relationship no longer meets your needs and you're longing for change? Maybe you've recently moved or you're struggling to integrate different cultural perceptions of life?
In my experience, relationships are as unique as the individuals that participate in them. Couples may disagree about their living situation, sexual preferences, children, or about an appropriate work-life-balance. However, sometimes these superficial topics reflect deeper issues and needs. How we feel and act in our relationships is often connected with our past experiences. Needs that were not met during our childhood might manifest in our lives as adults. If we're not aware of those needs or if we feel unable to voice them, we may feel triggered by our partners' behaviour or find it difficult to engage in satisfying communication. Especially when they're unable to process difficult emotions and anxieties, some couples become stuck in vicious cycles and begin to question their relationship and whether they are right for each other.
However, when appropriately addressed, challenging periods and conflict can also help us gain important insights and develop further – not only as a couple, but also as individuals. In this regard, couples counselling often proves to be beneficial for both partners individually. With that said, some couples decide to start counselling because they want to find new ways of relating and communicating, while others have already decided to separate and look for support in a reflective and neutral space. In both cases the relationship is changing and we can talk about what is needed in order to facilitate a helpful transition process.